I'm A Little On Edge. (That's a pun).

I told you a couple of weeks ago that we were doing some helicopter shots of a car going off of a cliff and I promised you pictures. I haven't posted any yet.

I suck.

We're not really driving the thing over the edge, but here's a little taste of what we were doing, though. This is the cliff it will look like we drove over. See the little white car waiting there? You can't tell from the pictures, but the ledge is about 100' above the river.

And here's the chopper with the chin-mounted camera. (It's not every day you get to shoot pics of a flying helicopter from above it. In the shot, the chopper would hover level with the cliff edge and then it would do a quick dive toward the river.


Here's another shot.


And that's all you get from that today. I have more...but no time to post about it. We're back at the same location today, but with the full company to shoot the stunts of the car fishtailing toward the cliff and then crashing through a break-away wooden guard rail. It'll all look fantastic...I promise.

I will tell you that one of the things we had to have done for the shoot today was get some boulders moved so we could drive the car onto a closed section of roadway. I showed up a few days ago to meet someone from the Parkway Authority to show them what we wanted moved and make sure they could do it for us. Instead of just being a meeting to point to stuff, when I showed up there was a front-end loader waiting for me and a guy who greeted me by saying, "Where d'ya want this shit moved?" I love big machinery and helpful people.

I'll shoot a bunch more pictures today. That'll give me a whole lot more stuff to feel guilty about not getting around to posting. It's delayed Lack-of-Gratification. I'm sure that's good for all of us somehow.

Almost A Jailbird.

It's a story that I can't really tell until next week, but I could have been arrested this morning. (I suppose that's possible on any morning, but today I had reason to suspect that it might actually happen.)

I'll tell you all about it next week, but suffice it to say, I'm actually a little disappointed that my incarceration did not transpire. It really would have made a better story.

Instead, I'm sitting on a lovely bench out by a swimming pool while our crew is happily ensconced in a big rambling house...just filming and filming away...and not calling me on the radio every ten minutes. And we seem to be having a little resurgence of clement weather (67º today), so I'm really quite happy and comfortable.

Oh, and I also didn't get a speeding ticket this morning because just as I was passing the hidden cop by the side of the road, some lunatic in a mini-van went flying by me doing about 90mph. He made a much more attractive target.

Score!

Just Hold It Right There! I've Got A Blog And I'm Not Afraid To Use It!

Polybloggimous is fast approaching its second birthday and I'm pleased to announce that it has been a force for good in the world. Yeah, that's right! Occasionally things have pissed me off and I've raced to my laptop to tell the world all about it. I'm quite proud of my record of fearlessly taking on giant corporations, international bestsellers and, even clueless kids toiling (poorly) at their first forays into the world of employment.

While it's true that any one of these entities might have come after me seeking retribution...or even just wishing to silence my lone voice in the dark, I haven't allowed myself to be deterred. I'll admit that when I first began revealing the problems I encountered in the world, I thought my little opinions would pass unnoticed. I thought, "I'm just one little guy with one little blog. Will my voice be heard?" Well I'm happy to tell you that the world is a better place today, due, in part to some brave stands I've taken here at Polybloggimous.

I'll let the results speak for themselves.

-I took issue with Jeffery Deaver's portrayal of Location Scouts...twice! Since I took my courageous stand, pointing out the errors of Mr. Deaver's ways, he's only published two or three books and had one movie released based on his writing. Take that DeaverMan!

-Dominoes Pizza is now delivering your pizza the moment you think of it! No need to order online or look up their phone number. Moments after you imagine the aroma of pepperoni and pineapple, your doorbell rings and you've got your pizza. I'm told they give away every tenth pizza for free and the deliverers say, "You've got Nathan to thank for this. We're just not willing to risk offending him ever again."

-StubHub has gone belly-up. They couldn't stand up to my withering revelations about their poor service and just decided it wasn't worth even trying.

-Grocery Baggers throughout the Continental U.S. are required to read my helpful post on the proper way to prepare your purchases for the trip home. (My reach hasn't extended to Alaska, Hawaii or Puerto Rico yet. It's something to do with their perverse sense of rugged individualism. Don't worry, I'll get them on board soon! Don't hold your breath about Canada, though. They don't even speak English there.)

I never would have thought, when I started this blog, that the power would be so AWESOME! And I realize that with great power, comes great responsibility. Fear not; I promise to use the power only for good.

Update - 10:59 a.m.:

I was afraid to tempt fate, so I dared not even hope...but my little missives have even created a Bizzaro-World version of Home Depot! It purely boggles the mind!

-Hopped in the car at 10:03.
-Encountered NO TRAFFIC driving to Home Depot.
-Slid right into a parking spot close to the building and dead-center between the entry and exit doors.
-Found a dolly of the right variety waiting for me as I entered.
-Went straight to the kitchen cabinets aisle where I found not one---but three--of the item I was looking for---ON A SHELF I COULD REACH!
-Had I not found what I was looking for, there was a gentleman in an orange apron standing at parade rest, right at the end of the aisle. He had a canny, intelligent twinkle in his eye. Had I made a mistake and pulled a box of SB-36-WK off the shelf instead of the SB-30-M that I needed, surely, he would have come to the rescue and corrected my error.
-There was NO-ONE in line at the registers.
-When I arrived at my car, another helpful gentleman in an orange apron materialized from nowhere and asked, "Can I help you get that loaded up?" And then he took the dolly back to the cart corral so I didn't have to.
-Back home at 10:37 a.m.

IT'S A MIRACLE, I TELL YOU! A MIRACLE!
None of this could possibly have anything to do with the fact that I got off my ass and went to Home Depot before 1:00 p.m. when all of the other lazy Sunday shoppers put in an appearance. NO! IT'S A MIRACLE!

Next week, I may take on the Church of the Eternal Caterwauling down the block. Their beliefs don't offend me, but parking on my block on a Sunday Morning is harder than on street cleaning days. I think they could benefit from more walking.

P.S. I'm going to Target later today where I expect to find nothing but clothes in my size -- on sale -- in the style I want -- for the appropriate season. If that lady who tries on pantyhose in the hosiery aisle is there, she'll be mercifully hidden from my view. The scanner will mistake the 30% off tag for an on sale for 30% of the listed price tag. It's gonna be great!

Arghhhhh!

Last Tuesday was the election for the next Mayor of NYC...and some other stuff. Of course, there were tons of print and broadcast ads and plenty of robo-calls. Since most of you aren't NYers and may not know, I'll give you the short recap. Mayor Bloomberg and current City Comptroller, Bill Thompson ran against each other. During recent years, the two of them repeatedly publicly stated that the other was the best Mayor/Comptroller the city has ever had. During the last year, while the election ramped up, they each repeatedly publicly stated that the other was the worst Mayor/Comptroller the city has ever had.

Bloomberg won the election, but only by a surprisingly small margin. It should be acknowledged that:

-Bloomberg sorta issued a unilateral legal-thingy that said term limits didn't apply to him so he could run for a third term in the first place.
-Lots and lots of people didn't bother voting because Bloomberg's reelection seemed like a foregone conclusion. (Frankly, I think it was the Bloomberg voters who stayed home, figuring their votes weren't really needed, but what do I know?)
-Bloomberg, a multi-billionaire, is said to have spent $180 per vote. (Personally, I'd prefer he pay me directly instead of inundating me with ads for two years.)

Anyway, I'll admit that my favorite thing about Wednesday morning was that the ad blitz had stopped and the election analysis would peter out in a day or two.

NY will have another election a year from now in November of 2010. Our Governor's term ends on December 31st 2010 and whoever wins takes office on New Year's Day 2011. The current Governor, David Paterson, you may remember, took office when Eliot Spitzer resigned 15 months into his term. Paterson is kinda behind the eight-ball at the moment. There have been stories that Obama (or his people or the DNC) have discouraged Paterson from running. There are lots of people calling Paterson the most ineffective Governor NY has ever had. (Did you ever notice that candidates are only capable of being the best ever or the worst ever? It's never, "Hey, he's kinda, sorta OK, but look at our guy, he's better!") Anyway, I think calling him the worst is overkill. New York has had lots of mediocre Governors. On top of that, I think if they're going to go after Paterson, they ought to just latch onto the scruffy-assed-Yasser-Arafat-Beard issue.

I don't really have any firm opinion about the guy at the moment...at least not in comparison to anybody else who may run. But the guy lost me this morning on one thing and he's going to have to work awfully hard to get me back into the undecided column. Actually, what he needs to do is...nothing...at least for a few months.

Ya see...this morning, less than a week after the previous election ended, this bastard was on TV campaigning for next year's election.

Hey David, any chance you could give it a rest for a couple of months? Pretty please?

I'm SpamTastic!

For the last couple of weeks, I've started getting comment spam...one or two a day...on old posts here. I won't further tempt the spam Lords by naming the products, but they all want to make you hairy, horny and capable. I've had to close three comment threads that inexplicably seemed to draw them over and over again.

I'm going to choose to view this all as evidence that my blog has hit the big time.

My delusions keep me happy!

More Glitz And Glamor On The Set.

OK, guys...here's another look as I pull back the curtain and reveal more of the glamorous life we production folks live behind the scenes. (With photo credits going to Malcolm Alston.)

Here I am out on the street with all of the trucks. There's no room on set and it's boring in there anyway. I've already had forty cups of coffee and somehow, the snacks at Craft Service don't look any more appealing now than they did an hour ago. So I do what any other self respecting production guy does. I help one of the PA's hold up the fence. I think we're doing a brilliant job.

But let me show you the real glamor. This, ladies and gentlemen, is the honeywagon. It's big and impressive looking and whenever there's a picture in a newspaper showing "behind the scenes" stuff, it's a shot of the honeywagon. Look at all of those doors. Look at all of those stairs. What on earth could be hidden behind those doors?

Most of them are dressing rooms for cast members who don't get their own big-assed trailers. But there's also a production office. How's that for glamor?


That's Lisa, the paperwork PA on the left and Megan, the 2nd A.D. on the right. They're buried in paperwork. If they open the door, it's just like having a window. A really noisy window with people bugging them...like Malcolm and I.

I'm not sure they appreciate our visit.
And ignoring us just makes us more obnoxious. Look at all of that space. It's practically the corner office!

But let's get to the real star of the honeywagon. This is why a production really panics if the honeywagon is late to set.



Now you know!

Sunrise / Sunset

The Tri-boro (they won't get me to start calling it the Robert F. Kennedy) and the Hell Gate Bridges at sunset yesterday.

And look. It's all still there at sunrise this morning. Who-da-thunk-it?


I have a backlog of pictures to post with really boring stories to go along with them. I'll get around to it.

Soon.

I swear it.

Have a happy Wednesday and chat amongst yourselves.