Just so you all know MultiPost Saturday is my excuse to just throw up random shit and consider it blogging. Don't count on seeing anything deep and meaningful here today, (like you ever do anyway).
Let the MultiPost begin...
We'll start with a Douglas Adams quote. Hey, you can't go wrong with Douglas Adams.
- There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
- Douglas Adams
P.S. I've used his name three times in quick succession. That's gotta be good for sucking in innocent GoogleSearchers.
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More on a Saturday Morning...So, I was just poking around at
Shawn's Cerebrum, and I felt the need to leave a comment. It took me like fifteen minutes to write a paragraph. I am Vocabularily Challenged. There was a particular adverb I wanted to use. It was right there at the tip of my Medula Oblongata, but it refused to reveal itself to me. Finally, in a moment of clarity, the clouds parted; the sun shined through, spearing my eye, the angels sang their heavenly chorus.
Debilitatingly, was the word I was searching for. Shawn's comment SpellCheck told me I was a crappy speller. It looked right to me. I went to Ask.com. (I find that Ask.com does a better job when I type in "Define ______" than most other search engines. It suggests better spelling more often that bears a resemblance to what I'm looking for). So anyway, Ask.com told me I was not deficient in my Spell-Fu. Shawn's comment window continued to put that ugly red line under the word. As is my wont, I chose to decide that I was right and ignore this blot on my intellect.
And another thing. Shawn's video posts are inspiring me to (possibly), follow his example. I'll be getting up at 0'dark-thirty every day, starting next week. (Right now the alarm goes off at 5:30 a.m. for leaving the house at 7:00 a.m.) I'll be getting up earlier soon. Why? I need an hour or more in the morning to become vaguely human.
I don't speak in the morning. Even more important than that is that I don't repond to speech in the morning. My mother use to tell me that when I was 6, I'd drag my ass into the kitchen in the morning and she was able to translate my inarticulate grunted response to "Do you want Cocoa Puffs or Quisp this morning?"
So, anyway, back to the point. Shawn recently posted a bunch of videos of himself talking to the camera before his first cup of coffee. (
Here they are.) First of all I couldn't believe how brave he was to post those things. I know he wasn't coherent while recording them. I have doubts about his coherence when he actually hit the publish button.
Also, watching
yesterday's video entry inspires me to think that I could post video impersonations of some of you guys...or at least impersonations of my
impression of some of you guys. (Shawn would actually be really easy.)
I'm not saying I'm going to actually
do this, but I think it would be funny. I'll think about it some more and let you know.
P.S. I already
know that all of you would like to see me mortifyingly embarrass myself by following through on this threat. Comments on this subject will be harshly judged because it's just too easy a target. I
will not be grading on the curve, so make sure you have your chops engaged before poking me on this topic. Just Sayin'.
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My Attitude about Facebook.
I don't remember exactly when I set up a Facebook account, but it was a while ago and I didn't actually do a thing with it. More recently, there's been a bunch of Juicy Heifer friending going on and I'm happy with that. Then, Kate invited me to be a vassal and play Knighthood. (I'm too lazy to link it right now, but you friend people, get them to build you stuff and give them (fake) money to buy loyalty and make them more productive.) Given the time, I'm pretty sure I'd really like playing with Knighthood (sort of an interactive game of Civilization), but there's a problem. It's designed for the folks who run around Facebook friending everyone in sight willy-nilly. And that's never going to be me. You only advance in the game if you keep enlarging your realm and keep assigning vassals (friends) to work in your newly expanded marketplaces, garrisons, etc.
You can never have enough friends in Knighthood!On the other hand, Facebook has resulted in me reconnecting with a few real-life friends from college and one I mentioned having worked with in Seattle a few years back.
Which brings me to this. Jeri, I can, with a fair degree of confidence, state that Mark (the aforementioned work friend in Seattle), is not a stalker, axe-murderer, or fiend of any sort. I had a meal or two at his house with his family and they seem completely normal and safe. Mark, I've been talking to Jeri online for quite a few months now and a few other people I talk to regularly online have actually met her in person. While full UCF membership is closed, I believe we came up with some sort of Adjunct Junior Space Ranger version some time ago. (You'll have to search the archives because I'm way too lazy to search and link stuff).
Anyway, the point is...if at some future date there were to be another UCFish link created, I can pretty much vouch for Mark, but as far as Jeri is concerned, it's entirely possible that she's a dangerous, psychopathic, deranged, zombie...posing as the mild PG-13 personna with the normal home-life and growing boys she claims to be. Her husband seems totally safe from what I've been able to deduce, but I'm not making any guarantees where Jeri's concerned.
Legal Disclaimer: Polybloggimous bears no responsibility for for any decisions made by its readers based on anything actually said or percieved to have been said here. As always, (cribbed from a great weather map over on
John's Site),
Use for information purposes only. DO NOT USE FOR LIFE AND DEATH DECISIONS. There's a high probability that that line is going up on my banner next time I make a new one.
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And Another Thing...If someone wants to photoshop a UCFish, I think that would be pretty funny.
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This Week In Text Messaging...
I received...
-Wazzup! It's Kate. Have a great pizza incident-free day!
-Hello, Nathan. You know you'll be getting these all day, right?
-Levitate the dragon, but still drink the soup.
-The super is going to be at least a half hour late for our appointment at Sterling Place.
-Ook! I'm a Librarian!
-Hedgehog Buggerer.
-Aren't we just a little fucking ray of sunshine? Cheer the hell up, dammit!
-Fucking flannel sheets! Oh, you meant paper sheets...sorry.
-Juicy Heifers say "MOO, Mofo, MOO!"
-Are you going to pick up your damned pizza or not? -Dominoes.
-Moo mother fucker, moo.
-Bitch shot me in the foot!
Does anyone detect a pattern? And what's with the weird message about the super being late? That doesn't belong here at all.
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Jeri Made Me Do This...It's a list of foods. I'll follow her instructions:
Directions: Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions. Bold all the items you've eaten. Cross out any items that you would never consider eating.
(BTW, I copied it but it ditched the columns, so here you go with one long-assed list.
1.
Venison2. Nettle tea
3.
Huevos rancheros4.
Steak tartare5.
Crocodile6.
Black pudding7.
Cheese fondue8.
Carp9.
Borscht10.
Baba ghanoush11.
Calamari12. Pho
13.
PB&J sandwich14. Aloo gobi
15.
Hot dog from a street cart16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18.
Fruit wine made from something other than grapes19.
Steamed pork buns20.
Pistachio ice cream21.
Heirloom tomatoes22.
Fresh wild berries23.
Foie gras24.
Rice and beans25.
Brawn, or head cheese26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper
27. Dulce de leche
28.
Oysters29.
Baklava30. Bagna cauda
31.
Wasabi peas32.
Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl33. Salted lassi
34.
Sauerkraut35.
Root beer float36.
Cognac with a fat cigar37.
Clotted cream tea38.
Vodka jelly/Jell-O39.
Gumbo40.
Oxtail41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects
43. Phaal
44. Goat's milk
45.
Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more46. Fugu
47.
Chicken tikka masala48.
Eel49.
Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut50.
Sea urchin51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55.
McDonald's Big Mac Meal56.
Spaetzle57.
Dirty gin martini (gin is just foul)
58.
Beer above 8% ABV59. Poutine
60.
Carob chips61.
S'mores62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs' legs
67.
Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake68. Haggis
69.
Fried plantain70.
Chitterlings, or andouillette71.
Gazpacho72.
Caviar and blini73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78.
Snail79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82.
Eggs Benedict83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
85.
Kobe beef86.
Hare87.
Goulash88.
Flowers (but also why?)
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91.
Spam92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94.
Catfish95.
Mole poblano96.
Bagel and lox97.
Lobster yes, Thermidor no
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake
and 101.
Stinky Tofu!So, I think I got 59? I lost count every time I counted. Probably more like 55.
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This just in...
I stopped at the book store, so I am now about to interrupt my reading of
The Yiddish Policemen's Union to read
Zoe's Tale by some guy or other. I really haven't had time to get too far into the former and I've been waiting for the latter. And somehow, because of Chabon beating out Scalzi for a Hugo, it seems slightly appropriate. (Don't worry Mr. Chabon. I'll be back with you presently.)
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A final addition...Unless something momentous happens, this will close out this weeks edition of MultiPost Saturday™. We just watched
Across the Universe (thanks Netflix) and it was pretty damned amazing. When it first came out, I was all excited to see it and then some of the stars were on one of the morning talk shows and performed. Sorry, but they sucked live. So I crossed it off my list.
Amazing what a few hours in the studio can do, though. There was only one song I
didn't like the way they did it. And I really want to know what kind of drugs Julie Taymor is on. She's obviously out of her mind...in a way that I admire the hell out of.
Before we watched the movie, I started
Zoe's Tale. Sucked in immediately. I read fifty pages while barbecuing. Guess what. I've already laughed a few times. I expected that. Then I bawled a little. Didn't expect
that. And then, I was laughing and bawling a little at the same time.
I've got to get back to it now that the movies's over. This may be one of those books I read in one sitting.