Friday, February 17, 2012

A Few Universal Truths.

If you're a terrorist in America and you want to buy explosives, you supplier will be an FBI agent.

If you read a headline along the lines of "Will your children travel to Mars?" or "Does eating raw dandelions prevent cancer?"... no matter how long the article is, the answer is NO.

If you hire a hitman to off your spouse, you've hired an FBI agent.

It's impossible for me to leave my house without spending $80.00 before I get home again.


Eric said...

My children are completely imaginary.

Therefore, they can go wherever the hell I want, thankyouverymuch.

Wave to Pluto, kids! Oh noes, Nancy Grace, what's she doing here?! Aieeee!

Nathan said...

Are you trying to say that Nancy Grace is A MAN?!. Everyone knows women are from Venus.

Eric said...

A: have you seen Nancy Grace?

B: it's a callback to a thread on a fellow UCFer's Facebook page, and (I assure you) very funny if you're in on the joke. (Really. Just hysterical. Side-splitting, even.)

Nathan said...

I've tried to divine just what thread you're talking about and I've come up empty. I feel so left out.

Eric said...

I wish old FB threads were easier to sort through. I guess I'd assumed you'd been in on this one somewhere. Sorry. :(

Nathan said...

Oh c'mon! Gimme a clue!

Megan said...

Yes, now the rest of us are curious, too.