Sunday, October 18, 2009

I'm In Hell

My assignment for the day is to figure out the Locations budget for the TV show I'm on. The illustration can be taken two ways -- that I've got a fistfull of dollars to spend or that I've got to squeeze my dollars 'til they cry. My boss prefers the second interpretation.

And it's not like I get to make this budget based on what I think I should be allowed to spend. The producer already created a budget months ago and it's my job to make my budget fit into the one he already created. This is sure to cause headaches...either for me if I manage to do it the way he wants it to turn out or for him if I do it the way that makes me happier. Odds are we'll both want some aspirin.

Anyway, there are a buttload of details that have to go into the budget I'm working up. Some items are based on deals I've already made. Some items are based on stuff we'll need that have fixed prices. Some items are wild-assed guesses. Some items are wishful thinking and fantasy.

So, today, I'm trying to figure out what it will cost to:

-shoot 86 locations in 31 days (including property owners, coop boards, and pissy neighbors).
-pay for bldg. labor like freight elevator operators and bldg. managers who need to be around when we're working.
-have a place for lunch for the crew every day.
-rent tables and chairs for the places that won't have them.
-have a place for the extras to hang out, change clothes and pee for 31 days.
-haul the garbage away every day.
-put up signs to get the crew where they're going every day.
-buy extra insurance for any out-of-the-ordinary scenes ... like stunts and stuff.
-pay for police when we need them (whether we think so or not).
-pay for fire dept. when we need them.
-pay for standby paramedics when we really, really, really, hope we don't need them.
-"courtesy payments"...uh, gratuities. Yeah! That's what they all are!
-trash bags, paper towels, sharpies, tape (gaffers, painters, duct!), cleaning sprays, toilet paper, brooms, mops, Goo Gone, WD-40, batteries, clip lights, light bulbs, makeup mirrors, power strips, matte knives, staplers, staples, zip strips, duvateen scraps, trick-line, sash chord, flashlights, plunger, padlocks....a bunch of supply type stuff.
-permit fees
-parking (for the crew and the trucks and the stuff we'll see in the shots).
-water (from hydrants).
-electricity (from the corner store when the generator is working on a shot two blocks away).
-nuisance abatement (How about if I buy you a really nice lunch for the rest of the day and you come back to jackhammer that sidewalk tomorrow?)

Well, you get the idea. There's a lot more, but it all amounts to having a fairy godmother look into a crystal ball and tell you what's going to happen on November 28th...and then, somehow keeping a budget based on fortune telling.

What are you doing with your Sunday?


Tania said...

I'm being domestic as all get out. Cooking, laundry, etc. Go me. Heading to the gym for a run and a swim in a bit.

neurondoc said...

Cleaning up. Your day is way scarier than mine...

MWT said...

I made a pot of soup out of expired canned food. I did not drop dead after eating said soup. I consider it a good day. :)

vince said...

I did some work, fought allergies, went for a bike ride, and did my radio show.

WendyB_09 said...

I did some laundry, a little cleaning, watched a little tv and worked on an updated resume.

Julie (the other one) said...

Don't forget to include The Big Yellow Key on your list of essential supplies!