I regret to inform you that the hurricane has caused a tree to fall across the hood of your car. The good news, however, is that the tree fell so gently that it is just leaning there and doesn't seem to have caused the slightest of imperfections to your automobile.
I am pleased to inform you that the city has come by and removed the tree from your vehicle. I regret, however to inform you that the removal of said tree from your car caused considerably more damage than the falling of the aforementioned tree.
Have a nice day.
Note: I didn't have my camera with me yesterday when I walked by this car, but the tree looked like it had been gently laid down across the car and there wasn't a mark on it. I went to get some pictures this morning and found that the process of removing the tree had fucked up the car considerably.