Thursday, June 17, 2010

Marketing To Morons

Before I say anything, let me just fess up:  I loathe Chase Bank.  I abhor them.  I hate them with a burning passion comparable only to something that...uh...burns really, really hot.  See?  Just the mention of them makes me completely lose all ability to come up with similes.  When I first moved to N.Y. I opened an account with Chase.  The fact that they demanded more background information to open a checking account than my previous bank in Boston had required to give me a car loan should have been a tip-off.  Once I finally decided I'd had enough, I moved my account to another bank.  Chase bought that bank three weeks later.  I moved again.  That one remained independent for almost 6 months before Chase assimilated them.  Resistance is FUTILE!  Now, I'm at CitiBank, and I'm actually mostly happy with them.

But that's all neither here nor there.  I just wanted to admit that I'm not fond of Chase to begin with.  They've got a commercial on the air right now that really bugs me. The intent of the ad is to let you know about some new service that gives you a 3% refund(?), discount(?) on things you buy with your Chase Debit Card.  I haven't paid close enough attention to know the details, but, hey...that sounds like a fine thing.

But to make their point, they show a couple of brothers(?) who are constantly racing to see who gets to pay for stuff and therefore qualify for the cashback reward.  Brother #1 is constantly shown at the cashier when brother #2 swoops into frame and swipes his card through the reader before the guy actually buying stuff can pay for it.  SCORE! Brother #2 is always the one getting the 3% reward "on stuff you buy anyway"!

Except it's not stuff brother #2 is buying for himself.  He's picking up the tab for brother #1.  The real winner here isn't brother #2 who gets the 3%'s brother #1 who is apparently getting 100% of everything he buys paid for by his idiot sibling.

Maybe the fact that the theme music from Deliverance is playing in the background should have been a clue that the commercial involves questionable breeding practices.


Janiece said...

Hey look! It's CLETUS.

Tom said...

And his other brother Cletus, too!

Nathan said...

They are NOT Cletus. They're Larry and Daryl and Daryl.