Thursday, June 23, 2011

Half Baked.


Sarah Palin, Alaska’s half-term ex Governor, today denied rumors that cutting her tour of America short by half should in anyway telegraph her intentions about a Presidential run.  Reached at home where she was eating half a sandwich (bologna, Cheese spread and Miracle Whip on Wonder Bread), she said, “I’ve halfway made up my mind about a run and I’ve got some partially formed ideas if I do decide to jump in.  First of all, I’m not sure I’ll bother  choosing a running mate.  I mean, really, who cares about the Vice President?  I think there’s a lot to be said for half a ticket.”

Earlier in the day, Palin had explained that the reason she had returned to Wasilla was because she had been called for jury duty.  However, when reporters trailed her in what appeared to be the direction of the courthouse, she stopped at a convenience store halfway there to buy a half tank of gas.  Then she went into the store and chatted with the store’s owner for half an hour before reappearing with a half case of beer and returning home.

Expanding on the question of whether or not she’s planning to run, Palin said, “Listen, I just haven’t decided yet.  But if I do, you can take it to the bank that I’ll be jumping in with one foot!”

6 comments:

Megan said...

At this point, I suspect it doesn't matter if she's elected president. Does anyone really think she'd last a full term? Just get a decent VP in place so someone can take over when she quits.

Tom said...

Half-assed? Where's the half-assed comment. Seems like a natural.

Oh, you probably didn't want to go there, seeing as how you're all classy and stuff.

Nathan said...

We saved that half-a-space for you, Tom.

WendyB_09 said...

I’ve halfway made up my mind...

That would be half a mind (half a brain if you prefer) - if that much.

filelalaine said...

If we make her apply the remainder of her presidential-run-fundraised money towards the deficit when she quits, we will be half-way there.

Nathan said...

I'd be satisfied if she just decided to quietly go live off of it and leave the rest of us alone. (It wasn't any of my money.)