Wednesday, July 1, 2009

UCF: Saving The Playboy Bunnies!

First we were a government funded cabal, for which I was never paid, thank you very much. Now, we're saving the Playboy Bunnies.

You guys never tell me shit!

Actually, it's the other UCF and they're actually saving an endangered sub-species of rabbit. I deem us excellent by association (even if there's no association whatsoever).


Eric said...


As a member of the other UCF, I am happy to volunteer to offer to provide a home for the other kind of Playboy Bunny. I will love her and feed her and I will only call her "George" if she wants me to because it's short for "Georgia" or "Georgina" or she has an unusual name or it's just a thing for her (I'm not judgemental). I do not have a "grotto" but my condo complex does have a swimming pool (some percentage of the residents may require my new adoptee to wear a swimsuit while using the pool, but I'm willing to bring it up at the next HOA meeting). I can probably adopt more than one Bunny if acceptable.

Thank you for considering my application.


R. Eric VanNewkirk
Standing On The Shoulders Of Giant Midgets

Jim Wright said...

Eric, your selfless philanthropy always leaves me in awe. If only more people were like you.

I tried to follow your example and adopt a couple of homeless Penthouse Pets, but my selfish wife would have none of it.