I've decided to stop shaving and show you the results. Don't get me wrong...I'm not growing a beard; I'm just not shaving. There's a difference.
And if I wanted to, I could claim it's some stunt to raise awareness for something. Apparently, women all over the world are posting their bra colors as their Facebook status updates...all in the name of raising awareness about breast cancer. My lack of shaving could do just as much to raise awareness about...oh, I don't know...the plight of Pacific Sea Slugs? Whatever.
I'm just not shaving. And you'll get to keep up with the progress. (Although progress would be the right word if I were growing a beard as opposed to just not shaving.) This will be more of an exercise in benign neglect. You can all watch as my face takes on the trappings of an un-mowed lawn. Maybe a ratty old couch will show up on the porch as time goes by. Possibly even a 1971 Chevelle...on cinderblocks. Who knows what may happen.
In the meantime, check back every day to see how hairy my face becomes.
Disclaimer: This is my stupid idea. I reserve the right to trim, dye, shape, comb, wax, brush, curl and/or straighten my beard as it appears of its own volition. I further reserve the right to discontinue this course of non-action at the time and place of my choosing. Let's all see how long this lasts.
Now, without further ado...stuff growing on Nathan's Face!
Beard! Day 1
Beard! Day 2
Beard! Day 3
Beard! Day 4
Beard! Day 5
(And it only took four days for someone to mention that I need a haircut. Thanks Steve!)
Sorry, I missed a couple of days. The images really aren't that hard to imagine, though...are they.
Beard! Day 8
Please note the amount of white that's sneaking into my beard. This might get interesting.
Beard! Day 10
And now, a brief interruption to consider the immortal words, "Your beard is weird."
Beard! Day 12
You may note that I finally got a haircut. If Shawn can get one three days after his house burns down, I can be shamed into making the effort!
Beard! Day 14.
This one doesn't really show the beard to great effect, but I liked it. It's kind of accusatory, doncha think? And it was an experiment with shooting myself blind with my camera phone. WooHoo!
Beard! Day 23.
Tomorrow I'll be clean shaven again!
20 comments:
Dude, you're starting to look like Scalzi. With a mustache. o.O
That's a dirty lie! I have lots more hair.
I'll give you money if you dye your beard.
Seriously.
HOW MUCH?
Can I suggest that you're raising awareness for the Great Pacific Garbage Patch? It would be sort of fitting, I'd think.
OK fine. You're all free to imagine me imitating Sally Stuthers (with facial hair) and a tear in my eye. And I'm saying, "Won't you please think of the Great Pacific Garbage Patch?
Nathan, I don't think you'd be a contender in the Mountaineer Beard Growing Contest.
Michelle, you evil wench. I'll make you eat those words.
Note: Those people appear to have had a month of shaving-cessation/beard production. We'll have to see if I even last that long.
¡Tu eres la más machista!
Though, wouldn't that be a feminine adjective?
I have no idea Todd. I just went with what BabelFish told me.
But if you're right, I think that's pretty damned funny.
It isn't the scraggly beard that gets me, it's the progressive dishevelment of the rest of the hair.
And I vote for waxed. There's a dearth of waxed mustaches in the world today.
Nathan, you up for lunch tomorrow?
That's right. A month. So after a month, do you get flowing facial locks?
And does Anon GF even allow you in the house?
This reminds me of those before and after pictures you see on the "Don't do Meth" posters.
What?
Shut up Jim. I'm trying to get the perfect look for my new passport photo.
My daughter Hannah took one look and said, "If I worked for the TSA, I'd send that guy through the new x-ray backscatter machine for sure. Because frankly, if fair and balanced Fox news says it will protect our country, I'm all for it. And that guy looks creepy."
Okay, okay, she didn't really say that. Just the "that guy looks creepy" part.
David,
I've been "randomly selected for additional security" on every flight I've taken since 2001. I have no flight plans in the immediate future, but this really couldn't make it worse.
Looks like you need more white in your mustache to match the incoming beard...
You're beginning to look like Emmitt Smith!
Yes you do have flight plans in your future - and yes, if I were TSA I'd be putting on the latex. ;)
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