Monday, July 6, 2009

The Rogaine of The Internet Grows Another Follicle on The UCF Hairball---and I'm Not Calling Anybody Pitiful, But...

First of all, I made my radio debut on Vince's show here in lovely Ely, MN last night. I know for a fact my fan was listening. I've got the text messages to prove it. When I get around to it, I'll post a more thorough description of my experiences on End of the Road Radio -- and there's pics! (Anon GF was recruited as our staff photographer.)

I'll get to that in a day or so. I promise.

In the meantime, what the hell is wrong with you people. There's a CONTEST going on here. Now I know there's been a little holiday, and I know I didn't exactly give you guys a killer deadline -- there's still a week to submit entries -- but the response, so far, is...really pathetic. Without making any value judgments on the entries that have shown up to date, I just want to point out that the current standings are unavoidably easy to recount:

Currently in First Place: Eric!
Currently in Last Place: Eric!
Currently the only Judge named to the panel to help me decide: Eric!

None of that was hard to figure out since Eric has submitted the only friggin' entry!

Now get with it people!

5 comments:

Eric said...

As the only judge named to the panel, I hereby declare the deadlines for submissions CLOSED! On to the judging:

I found Eric's submission, riffing on the ancient Law And Order franchise with a bit of current events from North Korea thrown in, to be timely, clever, pointed and witty. I'm honored to declare Eric the winner.

On the other hand, Eric's submission, riffing on the ancient Law And Order franchise with a crude and desperate stab at referencing recent events in North Korea, to be a horrible embarrassment and a disgrace to the entire concept of the contest. I mean, Law And Order?!? Jeebus H. Christ, dude, that is soooooo played out at this point. And a tacky half-assed reference to real political prisoners. And didn't your rubber duckie Scalzi contest submission several years ago reference Chinese reeducation camps? Now we're doing North Korea? Helloooo? Stripmine the same vein, much, jackhole? Dude. You suck. Totally and completely. The only reason not to give you last place is because you don't deserve that much recognition. But since nobody sucks harder, you have it. Enjoy it. Jerk.

Random Michelle K said...

I don't watch TV, so I'm having a hard time with the whole spinoff bit, since the only spinoffs I watched were ST ones.

And those have been done to death.

Now I could try and create a Barney Miller spin-off...

Todd Wheeler said...

Would love to read Random Michelle's Barney Miller spinoff. Who would she choose? Chano? Nick? Wojo?

Jeri said...

That's my challenge, I don't watch tv either so I have very little context. Although I'm considering a Happy Days spinoff...

Eric said...

Excuses, excuses. I don't have cable and I don't have a digital converter, and before the switchover I didn't have an analog antenna. I haven't watched TV on TV at home in four years (I have caught a few series/seasons on DVD or... ah... other dubious sources).

Not that it matters: I've already won and lost the contest, so THPPHBBBTHT!