Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Defective Cats (and Alarm Clock) Available. Cheap.

This is an acceptable time for the cats to wake me up when I have no appointments before 1:00 p.m.

This is not.

Unfortunately, the two things look remarkably similar to a set of eyes that

A.) have just opened.
B.) have not yet benefited from the application of corrective lenses.
C.) can barely see around the cat's ass perched in the line of sight.
D.) all of the above.

Furthermore, it errs on the side of suck, when one doesn't realize how early it is until the cats have been duly fed and the first pot of coffee is already brewed.

All of the above items are available to a good home. Actually, isn't "good" kind of a subjective concept? Just tell me you want the damned things.


neurondoc said...

I once thought I heard my alarm, got up, brushed teeth, showered, and got dressed. Then I realized it was Saturday. At 4:30 am. And of course I couldn't fall back to sleep.

Good morning!

Random Michelle K said...

I already have two defective cats.

However, we shut them in the basement at night, so they cannot awaken us early.

This made my life much happier, as the small secondary (and stupid) cat, things 3AM is an awesome time to tear around the house and knock shit on the floor.

mattw said...

No cats, no defective alarm clocks, but I do have a two year old that will wake up any time (or multiple times) between 4 and 7.

vince said...

My cats are only semi-defective. They won't wake me up directly, but indirectly, through knocking things over and getting into fights with each other.

neurondoc said...

Oh, and we also have two defective cats. One likes to stand in the hallway and shriek at the top of her (shockingly large) lungs at 2 am. The 6 year-old, thankfully, sleeps through the night...

Jim Wright said...

We keep Stupid and Tubby locked in the main downstairs part of the house at night.

I'm not big on the whole cats on the bed thing.

MWT said...

I suspect the cats think everything is working perfectly, considering that you fed them...