Monday, August 10, 2009

Stupid Human (Municipal and Corporate) Tricks.

I'm hot and annoyed and I can't be bothered to give you links for any of the crap I'm about to tell you about. Trust me. Have I ever steered you wrong?

Stupid Humans

The Oxygen Network ran a survey recently of women between the ages of 18 and 34. (Presumably, these were fans of the network or at least Oxygen's website). When given the choice, something like 80% said they'd prefer to win next season's America's Next Top Model instead of a Nobel Prize. I've got a few problems with this. First, and most obvious is the fact that anyone who's top aspiration is to be America's Next Top Model probably has a better chance of contracting Swine Flu, the Ebola Virus, and getting hit by lighting and a train all in the same day than they do of ever being in the running for a Nobel Prize.

Second, just how many potential Nobelists do you think spend a great deal of time following the Oxygen Network.

Stupid Municipalities

I've talked about how hard it can be to park in NYC. Well, since it is NYC, practically every country in the world has a Consulate or Mission here. And since they want to be convenient to the U.N., most of them are scattered around the east side of mid-town. And they all have parking spaces reserved for them on the streets. (They park outside of the reserved parking and get tickets for it all the time, but since they have diplomatic immunity, they never pay the tickets. But that's another topic.)

Anyway, some poor schmuck hit parking gold last week. He pulled into a space just after street cleaning ended and figured he wouldn't have to move the car again for an entire week. He says he even walked the block and confirmed that he wasn't in one of the areas reserved for diplomats or any other oddball agency. Jackpot!

Unbeknownst to him, one of the consulates had requested (and gotten approval) for one more parking space on the block. So the city workers showed up after he'd parked and moved the no-parking sign one car length so that now he was parked in a no parking zone. Of course he was ticketed. And then he was towed. It took him almost a full day and about $300 to get the car out of the tow pound.

BTW, a store owner and 3 doormen on the block saw what was going on and tried to reason with and the tow truck driver explaining that the car was legally parked until the sign was moved. The tow truck driver is quoted as responding, "I don't give a fuck!"

Stupid Corporations

You'll also recall my difficulty getting tickets to a Yankees game from StubHub (that paragon of suck). Well, StubHub (may they rot and go bankrupt), has an official relation ship with the Yankees, so now I get emails from the Yankees telling me about wonderful deals they have to offer. (I've unsubcribed twice, so far). This morning, I get an email telling me I can come take a tour of Yankee Stadium for $20.00 (which I'd bet is more than it costs to buy a bleacher seat at most ballparks in America). Woohoo, Such a Deal. I didn't read all of the details since I have no interest whatsoever in paying for a tour of Yankee Stadium, but I did notice these things:

-You can specify the day you want to tour the stadium, but you won't know what time your tour is scheduled for until you print the tickets.
-They offer a $5 discount for seniors and children, but you can only buy those tickets in person at the stadium (presumably with said seniors and/or children in tow with 3 types of government issued I.D.)
-They note that the tours sell out on a regular basis, so you shouldn't take a chance on any senior or children's tickets being available when you get to the ballpark so they recommend you buy the full priced tickets on line to guarantee you'll all get in.



neurondoc said...

All of this made my brain hurt. I hate email lists that refuse to let you unsubscribe.

Nathan said...

Jeez, wouldn't it be great if someone at your work knew anything about brains and making them feel better?

Oh well.

Random Michelle K said...

Are you using Entourage for your e-mail program? If so, you can tell it to block that sender so those e-mails never darken your inbox again.

See! A comment!

And you never did get back to me about the retribution post. :)

Eric said...

Nathan, your stereotype of models is completely off-base, cruel, and misguided. There are plenty of intelligent models out there. Take Jenny McCarthy: she's smarter than almost the entire medical community!

Nathan said...

Eric, it is possible you misperceive my assertion. I cast no aspersions on said models' perspicacity. I merely point out that, like Ms. McCarthy, they will never be able to break the glass ceiling that keeps them out of the widely read (though somewhat dry) medical journals and, unfairly relegates them to the scarcely acknowledged annals of Oprah's Book Club.

It just screams of injustice!