Thursday, April 24, 2008

Thursday's Dumbass...Courtesy of Indiana

Tony Zirkle wants the Republican nomination for the Congressional seat from Indiana's 2nd District. Tony Zirkle is a dumbass.

He claims he didn't know very much about the group he'd been invited to speak to. He's apparently not very good at deciphering subtle clues.

He went on to defend his appearance thusly:

"I'll speak before any group that invites me," Zirkle said Monday. "I've spoken on an African-American radio station in Atlanta."

Yeah, that's comparable.

Mr. Zirkle ran also ran for the seat in 2004 against the incumbent Chris Chocola. At the time, Zirkle said he was "willing to debate the idea of returning the guillotine and lynch mob for those who prey on children under the age of 12". He was unable to get Chocola to debate him on that or any other subject.

Bonus: He's retired from the Navy. Anybody out there ever met this guy? Hmmm?


13 comments:

Janiece Murphy said...

Oh, my. Dumbass for sure.

I can thankfully say I don't know this guy.

Nathan said...

Yay!

My first opportunity to delete an asshat commenter. (He was after Janiece and he is...no more.)

Michelle K said...

Holy fucking shit.

I am... speechless.

If I showed up to a place like that, not only would I not speak, but I'd tell everyone about the creepy place and people.

What an absolute moron.

Jeff Hentosz said...

Linking to the story is insufficient, because this point cannot be emphasized enough: this was a birthday party for Hitler.

With a cardboard "Happy Birthday" sign strung across the front of the table.

Don't these people know der fuhrer would've had them shot for not wearing Spongebob party hats, too? I swear.

Nathan said...

Jeff,

I knew it was celebrating Hitler's birthday, but until you pointed it out, I didn't notice the "Happy Birthday" on the front of the dais.

Yes! That is too fucking funny.

And, BTW, I didn't realize it at the time, but the guy I deleted earlier?

He's the Commander of the American National Socialist Workers Party. Wow!, do I attract a tony crowd!

vince said...

And, BTW, I didn't realize it at the time, but the guy I deleted earlier? He's the Commander of the American National Socialist Workers Party. Wow!, do I attract a tony crowd!

Oooo, don't you feel special? Now you can start competeing with Jim Wright for asshat commenters.

Mr. Zirkle and the group he spoke at are prime evidence of devolution.

Nathan said...

Vince,

Since I started this blog, that's the one and only comment I've ever deleted. I don't think I've ever even been tempted before...and before anybody gets the idea that it was all "foamy at the mouth", it was really just some lame thing about it being nice that us pampered liberal white guys had time to post about stuff we don't understand...or something like that.

Anyway, I don't seem to have any Trolls yet and I certainly haven't been attracting any vicious emails, so I think I've got a ways to go before I give Jim a run for his money.

I promise to work on that. :D

MWT said...

Well, that's no fair. The only things I've ever deleted have been blatant obvious spam. At least your offenders have actually read your posts (or at least the first sentence or two). :|

Michelle K said...

Nice how a racist thug would assume you were a "pampered liberal white guy"

I can say that something like that isn't worth disemvowelling.

Michelle K said...

mwt,

I actually had a local politician comment on my site and whine how it wasn't wrong of her to take money from big asshole coal baron.

I think I'd rather have her than a racist thug.

Nathan said...

Well, if I start getting comments from local politicians, they're staying posted no matter what.

The Nazi guy posted under his real name (with links to his website) and I didn't want any Google searches for him bringing his friends here.

Politicians should feel free to come here and make asses of themselves.

:D

Eric said...

My favorite bit--no, wait, my second favorite bit (nothing can top the "Happy Birthday" streamer in front of the podium) is this comment:

"Zirkle compared his speech to other politicians appearing at Bob Jones University."

...because nothing adds insult to injury like explicitly comparing your own potential supporters to Nazis. "What's the big deal--it was just like speaking at Bob Jones except they had more flags and they served birthday cake. Also, I got to ride a pony and eat ice cream."

This was good, too:

"Zirkle said he did not know much about the neo-Nazi group and that his intention was to talk on his concern about 'the targeting of young white women and for pornography and prostitution.'"

...because, you know, Zirkle actually was going to say something about targeting black women for prostitution but for some reason his audience started looking bored and began to fidget a lot. This one gut started using his conical party hat with rubber-band as a kind of slingshot to shoot Jolly Ranchers at this other guy at his table and so Zirkle had to try to change the subject because he was afraid the one Nazi was going to start crying after the third Jolly Rancher got kind of stuck in his hair because the Nazi who was misusing his hat had put the candy in his mouth before he shot it. Horrible scene, just horrible, terribly reminiscent of the ugly scene when Joseph Goebbels pantsed Julius Streicher at Hitler's 49th birthday party back in 1938.

Steve Buchheit said...

"Politicians should feel free to come here and make asses of themselves."

Thanks, I'll try my best.

(engage political cluelessness function) At first I was thinking, well, what's Nathan all up about this guy speaking at a Birthday Party. Then I realized that he was just commenting on the obvious lack of style and originality of the group. (re-engage actual brain function)

Uhm, yeah. That's one sure way to get elected. Can we change what the switch in the booth actually activates (you all still have switches in your elections booths, right?). If so, I'll throw the SOB.